Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy – Dealing with Nasty People
‘I feel like a hedgehog that has lost its spikes’! said a relieved young university student who had come to me for help with excessive anxiety.
The medication she’d been given at university to deal with her anxiety had only made her feel numb. In her words ‘it was like sticking a plaster on a wound that needed stitches’.
As a way of filling the gnawing emptiness in her stomach, she’d learned to lash out at family and friends. By the time she reached her early twenties her negative behaviour meant she’d developed the unsavoury reputation as being the nasty person who picked fights and was needlessly rude.
Most of is know someone who’s known as the ‘nasty one’. If you Google ‘how to deal with a nasty person’ most search results suggest that you should stand up to them, distance yourself from them or both. Based on client feedback, these are the worst things you can do.
Most of the time, nasty people lash out because they’re in a bad place. They lack self-esteem, compassion, forgiveness (usually towards the self) and social support (usually self-inflicted).
I know it’s easier said than done, but what if we took a step back and tried to understand ‘why’ rather than take umbrage. What if we reach out, rather than push away? Help that person to understand that you can see beyond the bad behaviour and are there if they need you.
They might not respond immediately, they may also become defensive or pass another mean comment; but give them an opening, a chance to show vulnerability and not be judged. You might end up creating a happy, non-prickly hedgehog!
What is Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy?
Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy (CBH) is an evidence based practice where Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is integrated with Hypnosis in order to maximise successful treatment. CBH practitioners aim to show clients that most psychological problems stem from negative self-hypnosis, self-defeating thoughts and negative imagery. Our job is to empower clients and teach them how to control the self-hypnotic process.
This blog was written by Saira Hasan, Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist www.hypno4ladies.com